The act of intercourse has never been the best part for me. Feeling him, knowing every part of his body inside and out, knowing his heart and him knowing mine having him appreciate the dip of my back, the softness of my touch…those are things I have always been in tune with. A step further…the stares, sounds and how each notices something new about the other each time; afterwards they inhale the scent created that belongs only to them. I admire his inhale and exhale and falling more in love with him as the moments tick by; he watches me sleep wondering how I’ve captured his heart; his soul. He wants to be inside of me not sexually but inside of my very soul because it feels like home to him.
I estimate that 98% of the human race will never experience intimacy. Most cannot accurately define intimacy (although the definition is subjective); where it begins, can it expand, can it be created with anyone or is it person specific?
Where does intimacy begin? Intimacy begins within; loving and accepting yourself unconditionally. Learning to listen to your spirit and give it what it needs without question. Knowing who you are authentically will enable you to attract your soul-mate; one with whom you will experience intimacy with.
Can intimacy expand? Yes intimacy expands when you experience it with your soul-mate; someone who is on the same spiritual level as you; someone who knows and allows their spirit to guide them. Intimacy is not relegated to words or actions; greatest parts of intimacy are knowing, feeling and simply being…experiencing each moment.
Intimacy has different levels and is person specific. I believe that levels of intimacy cannot be duplicated; what you share with one being will never mirror what you share with another. For example I share an intimate connection with my son; I can especially feel when something is “not right” with him even if I cannot identify the issue. This intuitive connection with my son seems stronger when we are apart. He often asks how I know things about him and my answer is simply, “With you, it’s my business to know.” Even if I had another child, the intimate connection between us would be different from the one I have with my son; no more, no less just unique. Levels of intimacy can also be applied to your parental connections, romantic connections, friendships etc.
Some of us feel more deeply than others and may experience fewer connections of intimacy. Long before I understood who I am and the idea of everything and everyone being connected, I often wondered why I did not have someone in my life I could turn to without hesitation. Why no one seemed to understand me or stick around long enough for me to share a profound closeness with. Sure I’ve had a few close friends and a few good romantic relationships but years later there is no one I feel close enough to reveal my authentic self to without fear of judgment or feeling as though they just don’t get who I am.
Knowing intimacy yet not having an opportunity to experience it is quite disheartening but I’m unwilling to settle for less than what will nourish my spirit. If the relationship is not one of unconditional love, acceptance and knowing then I will not waste my time; sounds a bit arrogant…perhaps, but I’ve spent most of my life settling; making a habit of not doing much to fulfill my deepest feelings and desires. If I never experience another intimate connection, I will find comfort in knowing that I was finally true to my authentic self.
I’d love to know how you define intimacy so please share your thoughts. I don’t have all of the answers and I am always willing to learn.
As always wishing you Love, Peace & Blessings…